A lot of learning there

Stepping into the world of business will make you go crazy at the initial stage. Eventually as it starts working, as your idea finds a market and as you start making profit along with a lot of ups and downs, you start enjoying the fun part of it. Since right now I am a no body in this field, I shall talk about the hard ships. I don’t know how successful a person I will turn out to be (although I hope and believe to be one soon), I am writing about the failures and the little wins, about getting ditched and also finding that one supportive person, about the happiness of newly found independence and the pangs of loneliness.

I took a metro to CP all by myself at 6 30 in the morning. It was one hour away from where I was staying. I kept calling the person who was supposed to be my teacher here. It came out of coverage area giving me the impression that he has already left. In that one hour I kept making reasons for why I got 15 min late, made up some questions to ask him during the journey - is it a baby boy or girl, shoot is going to be in a hospital, will there be enough light and so on. I reached the showroom of UCB where he told me to meet. I could see no signs of him or his car. I sat there for one more hour waiting; the sun right there on the top and in Delhi’s incredible weather conditions, empty stomach, I waited. Furious, I called up my sister that I was heading back home.

What plans I had made while in Indore and what was happening in reality, it was like a punch in my face. I shut the door of my room and started with watching FRIENDS for I guess 4- 5 hrs straight; falling for the very sitcom I didn’t have much interest in earlier; laughing loudly for the first time during a TV serial, I fell in love with Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, Ross, Rachel and Joey!  I waited for his call or a message; I didn’t expect someone to be that irresponsible with a girl in the capital. Didi and jiju trying all possible ways to cheer me up took me to watch Ghaachakkar. On our way back, I called him up, shouted, he apologized giving me next day’s schedule and I hung up.  I felt better, much better.

I did attend a couple of shoots, learnt how professional the guy had become in his work, how he was majorly interested in money and how his picture captions on FB page differed from what happened in reality, how he dealt with his clients and how irresponsible he was with his intern (ME), I learnt a lot.

Had I been a guy, he would have paid more attention, coz what appeared from his blue pink side bag for camera and other stuff, he was truly a happy and gay type fellow.

Anyway, let me not go into that.

For some reason, I think, my sister felt as if she was responsible somewhere. And also because she is my over carrying and sensitive sister, she tried to find alternatives, or at least some clients so that my coming to Delhi doesn’t go in vain. But I was simply not in a mood. Part of which was because of the 43 degree Celsius which was pissing me off.

Each day I would upload pictures, every minute checking for the no. of likes, getting depressed for no or little appreciation, even on receiving an inbox from people complimenting me and asking for rates, I couldn’t smile for there was no assurance that they will turn up again.

Sitting in air conditioned room, we decided to sponsor my FB page which was a happy prospect. Also we designed my catalog and it came out beautiful.  Since I was in Delhi, and its street markets are a heaven for shopaholics, I did exactly what you are thinking.

I have ideas brimming over my head. I am pretty good at my job. I can be better, no doubt, but more importantly I want to be better in marketing my art; the only reason why many talented people are found on roads, while the ones with that evil business mind build those roads. I used the word evil. May be I will be a business woman too in near future, but business is still evil. It’s how tactfully you win over someone even when you know that he is better than you. It’s the evil art of selling your art even when you know your buyers can have a better deal somewhere else.

I long for that one person I could have talked about this and also learnt. I still miss him and don’t know the reason for not staying in e-touch, for that was the only base of our relationship. May be people change and we can't do much about it. There comes a line of self respect at some point, and one better not cross it.

The moment I decided to make my career myself, to paint my future with colors I like, I have felt independent. I like the smell of it. My family and friends have always been supportive. But you can’t discuss everything with them. In case of friends even they must be going on with something or someone, and they must be having their life issues. I have felt drifted and aloof. And like any stupid romantic novel even I wish a handsome guy must cross the way of an independent lonely girl adding fun and support to her life.  

Grown up

Pakhi